In a classic 'do as I say, not as I do' gambit, she used to say that I should make sure to attend to the needs of any husband I had before my own, but I never believed her, not for a minute. She always did what she wanted, and never let me forget that we came from upper class stock. Once as I teenager I argued over something with her and she pronounced: "I'm right whether I'm right or not!" She was a fabulous conversationalist with a lively interest in the world right up until she died. I think Lane has that kind of spirit, and I believe many women of the period were equally powerful. All my female relatives were!